Prayer and praying

I have made a meditation corner in my bedroom. I have long had an ambition to have a tokonoma. One way I thought I might achieve this was to have a high bed in my room and have the tokonoma underneath. Recently, an opportunity came my way to acquire such a bed - a custom made solid wood bed from my brother. Unfortunately, his ceiling was 9 foot tall. And mine a mere 7. The legs would need to be shortened. And I didn't want to destroy the lovely bed. So, with that idea gone, I set about creating a corner for my chair. In its new position it is less likely to have coats and books dumped on it.

At the same time as creating this space, I purchased The Glenstal Book of Daily Prayer and have been using it for the past ten days. It contains lauds and vespers for each week day over two weeks. It recommends certain gestures, saying "human beings are embodied people and the body too must play its part in our relationship with God". This harked back to one of my earliest posts about particular physical positions. I don't pray every morning and evening, but I don't chastise myself, simply move the bookmark along to the page that is relevant at this time. And I begin to find myself yearning for my ten minutes of prayer and the opening and closing of the day. I still cringe at the "Christ" references - Christ as man etc. But I am very taken with "God" and asking him to listen, to "open my lips", praising him. Admitting sins - I have a problem with the idea of sin. Humility - I strive for it. Some prayers are repetitive from day to day. Some repetitive in the session. I light a candle.

Of all ideas that come from prayer and God, the one I find most reassuring is the giving over of some control to "His will". I cannot be wholly responsible for every path my life takes, although I can try to do my upmost. This thought is very powerful and comforting to me.